Now that it has been weeks since I've last signed in or even thought about blogging I've decided, blogging is boring. Why would you wanna read the thoughts of others or write senselessy about your opinion and thoughts to others when really, no ones gonna read it?
  That's why.... I've moved on .... to YOUTUBE.

That's right motherfuckers! This blog is pointless other than to tell you that I've made a youtube account with my friends and we're basically turning some blogs into vids and also making music vids, cuz we're lame like that. And i swear, if you don't watch em I'll hunt you down and hurt you. JOKING.
But seriously. ---> http://www.youtube.com/user/ProvocativeXoX

  Don't you hate it when you get something bothering you? And its bugging the crap outa you and most likely you have two main reactions. You either let the world know by squirming( and sometimes shouting) or......you try to act natural but your really uncomfortable and you try finding your way to the nearest source of privacy to deal it out? But either way popple look at you like..."what the fuck was that?"

  I find that these are the most common reasons for random outbursts in uncomfort...

1. You have an eyelash in your eye. It seems lame, but it usually goes down a lil something like this...
 Reaction #1      

Bytch: "Dude, the most amazing thing happened, so I met this pirate and his..HOLY SHIT OW FUCK THAT HURTS"
Bystander: "Woah, you alright?"
Bytch: "Fuck, I think I got something in my eye, awe shit that hurts like a punch in the ball sac!"
Bystander: what did she just say? "Have you tried blinking it out? Its okay just look down and keep blinking"
Bytch: "Oh, I think I got it, okay, cool, so anyway................. his name was pat!"
Bystander: What the fuck was that?

Reaction#2

Bytch: "dude, the most amazing thing happened...." eye twitching...... "so I met this pirate...."  eyes turning red and crying.
Bystander: "woah, are you alright? why are you crying?" 
Bytch: "Oh its nothing" eyes going swollen and having an eye seizure "so his name was pat!"  eyes turning bloody red, "will you excuse me?" walks off to find mirror
Bystander: what the fuck was that? 

 

2. Having a hair in your mouth.....
Reaction#1

Bytch: "so, the weirdest thing happened!? I was walking through the mall when........hugh, gguugghh, pppfffhhhhtttt, pphhhhsssssttthhhhht........"
Bystander: "are you okay?"
Bytch: "Ugh shit, I got something, pppfffthhhhttt, in my mouth" Making unnecessary noises
Bystander: "oh...ugh...you have a hair at the corner of your mouth??"
Bytch: "fffffttthhhhhhtt, ttthhhhsssssppphhhr" clawing at edges of mouth "Ugh, ew, got it. Damn hair. Haha, makes you wanna cut it all off eh?...."
Bystander: "heh, yeah.." was that suppose to be a joke, who'd cut all there hair off....other than psychopaths with bad marriages and armed umberella's (*cough*Britney Spears*cough*)
Bytch: "so in the mall I saw a Taylor Lautner look alike working at the ice cream shop!"
Bystander: "Hah! that's so cool!" ..... What the fuck was that??

Reaction#2

Bytch: "So the weirdest thing happened!? I was walking through the mall when...." *cough* "kkhhhmmm" moving jaw in odd motions as she talks, " and I swear I saw...ahem,gghhmmm, ahen" licking corner of lips "a look alike of...ahem" doing weird things with her tongue like a dog with peanut butter... "Taylor Lautner at an ice cream shop!"
Bystander: "ah-heh.....cool!" What the FUCK was THATT?!?!

 

  I'm sure you get the point. But imagine all the stupid things people do when there irritated. Personally, I can get pretty 'on the edge'. But these aren't the only situations that got people doing funny dances and twitching... imagine your best friend talking to you and something as simple as the tag on the back of her/his shirt is bothering them and they begin to do some weird ~voodoo~chicken~rain~potty~ritual~dance?? Or maybe your walking with them and they have a rock in their shoe and they start kicking around their foot but trying to make it look natural when there kicking the ground?? It's sad how easily it can happen... leaving your phone in your front pant pocket..or down your shirt while on vibrate? or someone threw something down your shirt? Either way, no matter how you handle it (unless your the master of disaster) it's most likely your gonna end up looking constipated......

Sex. Bytch

  So the last blog I wrote about was basically summed up into...if my kid wasn't hott I'd kill it. And I said my father didn't care about his own kid (not me) being a loser. Well apparently he does care about the other kid (me!)

  My dad has had MANY different impressions of me. I don't exactly know how it...wait. Now I remember; so me and my friends are very sexual (no shit.) And basically all the girls are very touchy and close but it's all for jokes...we don't care. But my dad doesn't understand that and he always seems to be walking in at the WRONG moment. For example, I went to the movies with my friends and while we were waiting for my dad to come pick us up afterward we decided to take pictures. [And trust me.....it's not such a great idea to be in an arcade with crazy (...and willing ;P) asians, a freak like me, and a camera.] So my friend and I are positioned in a VERY sexual manner...On an arcade motorcycle..........when my dad walks in too get me. Perfect. Now my father thinks I'm a lesbian.

  I thought that was bad.... but I've continued to give my father not so great impressions. One day, we were talking and I told him about how I've had trouble getting to sleep at night. I mentioned that it would be easier if we went and got "sleeping pills." I probably shouldn't have said that with my track record ;P (jks.) Later on he tells me about how we should 'talk about my personal health.' Absolutely perfect. My dad thinks I'm suicidal.

  It would take to much of my useless life away trying to describe all the situations I've been in where in the end my father looks at me with questioning doubts. But it took him a while until he finally found out what kind of person I REALLY am. A Whore. I found this sexy boy on youtube. And that brought back all the memories of hott boys I listen to on my ipod and so on and I honestly couldn't very long without mentioning how much, "I WANT JEYDON WALE IN MY PANTS!" or "I'D DO JOSH RAMSAY UP A TREE!" or...."I know my dad told me to calm down with my hormones...yes, he did say it....no, I'm not lying.

  But because of how ridiculous and confusing and WRONG I may be I think he has finally had enough. Every time he leaves the house for the night to go play hockey or pool I always find that the oven has 'mysteriously' turned itself on and the batteries have 'conveniently' run out of energy. I'm starting to wonder if maybe....just maybe......it's not an accident

Sex. Bytch